Axel, what's death?
by Raberba girl
Summary: This particular life lesson is not cute. Solemn AkuRokuShi. Rated for violence.
1. Axel, what's death?

"Axel, what's death?"  
(Rough draft)  
A Kingdom Hearts fanfic by Raberba girl

_For Dusty, 17 May 2012_

Summary: Solemn AkuRokuShi. Rated for graphic aftermath of violence.

A/N: Includes an implied spoiler for _Before Sora_, unless you already correctly guessed it from my last author's note on that fic. You can avoid the spoiler if you stop reading once they talk about returning to Olympus Coliseum at the end.

xXx

This new world was a pretty one. "It's so _green_," Xion laughed. Roxas listened to the wind rustling in the trees and said that it was nice.

"So where should we start looking for our target?"

"I dunno. There's not really a path, and I don't see any treasure boxes to go for."

"Hmmm...let's go that way, then," Xion decided, pointing in a random direction.

"Okay," Roxas agreed.

They were glad of their coats; it was cold wandering around in the morning mist. "I can barely see, it's all just trees and fog."

"Heh, our target could be creeping around three feet away and we wouldn't even notice."

"Could Heartless even be that quiet, though? It's like, every step you take here is so noisy..."

"Really?" Roxas started paying attention. "Oh." The crunch of fallen twigs underfoot, constantly having to push away branches, surrounded by the subsequent rustling of leaves. "Bet Xigbar could get through here easier." They both chuckled at the thought of the Freeshooter wandering about in the treetops upside down.

"I wonder why his coat doesn't flop over his face when he's walking in the air like that."

"His hair, too. You'd think it'd be dangling down like a rope or something, right?"

"Ha ha! I don't wanna find out what he'd do if someone ever yanked on his ponytail."

Their chatter died down as they continued trying to fight their way through the woods. It was getting hot now; they were no longer so appreciative of their coats.

"Hey...you think maybe we should split up?" Roxas finally asked.

"It might be easier to find it that way, right?" Xion said reluctantly. "Okay...let's check with each other every hour or so if we can't find it, okay?"

"Okay."

xXxXxXx

Maybe this hadn't been the best idea. Now Roxas was hot, tired, _and_ had no one to talk to. "Xion, I miss you..."

Sighing, he stopped to rest and drink some water. He wondered if he should eat his snack now, but decided to hold off on it until a little later in the morning. "Man, I hate missions where the boss hides. Stupid Heartless, just come out and let me beat you already."

Reluctantly, he straightened up again and moved on. The sooner they found and eliminated their target, the sooner they could go join Axel on the clock tower for ice cream.

The frustrating trek through the trees seemed endless, so Roxas was surprised when he came out into a little clearing and found something to break the monotony. The dogs were all staring at him as if they'd known he was approaching, their bodies poised on the edge of action.

"Hi," Roxas said uneasily.

One of the dogs suddenly yipped and bounded toward him, the rest of the pack following on its heels.

"Whoa!" The Keyblade burst into Roxas's hand with a flare of light, and he brought it up instinctively. "Back off!"

A few of the dogs hesitated, but others continued to approach, now looking more wary and calculating than excited. One of them was growling.

"Look, you guys are making me nervous, so just go away, okay? I'll mind my own business, and you mind yours."

There was a pause. Then one of the dogs barked, and they all rushed at Roxas again, this time more purposefully.

"Thundara!"

The growls and barks turned to pained yelping as strikes of lightning came sizzling down around Roxas. The jolted dogs fled at once; the ones who'd escaped injury hesitated, staring at Roxas in confusion, then bounded away after the rest of the pack.

"I _told_ you to leave me alone." The young Nobody continued on his way again, this time more on guard. He dismissed his Keyblade after awhile, but still kept alert, watching, listening...

xXxXxXx

A sound. Roxas stopped dead, straining to hear. _'That wasn't a forest sound.'_ Not rustling or pattering or an animal call, it had sounded very much like the corridors of darkness did when they were opened or closed. _'So if it's the Heartless, is it finally showing up, or is it running away?'_ He searched, but could find no sign of anything out of the ordinary. Still... "I'd better tell Xion." He checked his map, noted his current location, then opened a corridor.

When he found Xion, she was totally slacking off. "Saïx is gonna be mad if he finds out you were playing with animals on a mission instead of doing your job," Roxas laughed as he walked up.

Xion giggled. "Who's gonna tell him, though? You?"

"Of course not!" Roxas knelt down beside Xion to get a better look at the creatures. The big one sniffed at him warily, then sneezed. "Sorry," he said with a grin. "I smell like Nothing, huh." The fox lay back down again with her ears back, looking unhappily resigned.

"Isn't he cuuuuute?" Xion cooed, holding up the tiny one she had been cuddling.

"Yeah, he's cute," Roxas agreed, taking off his gloves to scratch the fox kit behind the ears. He _loved_ touching animals without his gloves, they were so freaking soft. The kit mewled and playfully batted at Roxas's hand. "They look like Axel."

"I know! They're all red, and I _swear_ the little baby smiles just like him."

Roxas only meant to let himself be distracted for a few minutes, but at one point he stopped petting the mother fox and realized they'd been at it for...quite a bit longer than a few minutes. "Hey, Xion, I think we- Oh! I completely forgot why I came to find you in the first place!"

"So fluffyyyyy," Xion cooed at the fox kit.

"Hey, Xion, focus. I think I heard the Heartless."

She stared at him in dismay. "Just now?"

"Well, no...it was a while ago, but I marked on the map where I heard it. Except...well, I think it was actually escaping, because I couldn't find it when I looked around for it."

"So it could be anywhere."

That did make it sound like they were exactly where they'd started. "Well...yeah."

Xion made a long sigh. "Oh well, I guess we _should_ really be getting back to work... Oh, Fluffy, I'll miss yooouuuu!" she mumbled into the kit's fur.

Roxas grinned. "I wonder if Axel would like these guys."

"Of course he would! Who couldn't?"

On impulse, Roxas leaned over and planted a kiss on the big fox's head. "Bye, Mama. We'll see you again next time we have a mission in this world, okay?"

She looked at him for a moment. Then resumed watching her baby.

Xion carefully nestled the kit back against his mother's fur (where he was immediately subjected to an anxiously-administered washing), then sighed again as she reluctantly stood up. "Okay, so you said you marked the map, right?"

More tromping through the woods, though it was nowhere near as boring or tiring now that he had Xion back. "Let's see, I think it was around here... Yeah, the dogs were back in that clearing, so then I came through this way - man, it's hard to trace paths in huge open areas like this where there's no walls or hallways-"

"Dogs?" Xion said, eyes lighting with interest.

Roxas paused. "Not like Pluto," he said slowly.

"Huh?"

"I mean...they weren't, like, cute, or nice. I had to fight them off."

Her eyes widened.

"It wasn't that bad," he said quickly, "I just cast some Thundara and they ran off." He paused again. "It's just that...if I was a human, and I didn't have magic or a Keyblade or anything..."

"Dogs _attacked_ you?" she gasped.

"I'm fine, Xion. It's just that I don't think these are the kinds of dogs you would like, that's all."

"I dunno," she said doubtfully, "every dog I've ever seen has always been so..." She made a gesture that he figured meant something like "squee."

"I don't know how to describe it. They didn't look like they wanted to have fun or make friends, you know?" No, that wasn't quite right. "Or it's like...they wanted to have fun the way the bad guys want to have fun. They hurt other people and they laugh while they're doing it."

Xion stared at him. "Dogs don't laugh."

"I know. I told you, I don't know how to describe it."

"Okay," she said doubtfully. "I guess I hope we don't see those dogs again."

"Me, too."

They never did see the dogs again. They heard them, though, an hour or two later. "What's that?" Xion wondered uneasily as the baying started in the distance.

"That pack, maybe," Roxas murmured. His Keyblade appeared in his hand, even though the noise was a long way off.

"...Why are they barking like that?"

"I don't know."

"...I hope they're not having fun. If they're like you said."

"Yeah."

They should have been continuing their mission, but instead they just stood there, listening. The pack's baying eventually faded.

"We should...get back to work," Roxas finally said.

Xion was quiet for a long time. "Yeah."

They went on looking. Once or twice, they heard the corridor noise again, but every time they hurried to the place where they thought they heard it, each of them running off in completely directions, there was nothing there.

"You think it's playing a trick on us?" Xion wondered.

"Hmm. Next time we hear it, let's not run right away. Let's wait and see if we can agree on a direction."

"Yeah, we should try that."

A little later, the pack's howls started up again, closer this time. Xion gripped his arm hard. "Roxas, I have a bad feeling."

He stared at her. "Xion, you can't have a 'feeling.' We're Nobodies."

"Well, whatever this is, it's bad and I don't like it. I don't like how those dogs sound."

"...You want me to go hit them for you?" Roxas said doubtfully.

Xion didn't answer, which probably meant 'No,' except he could tell that she kind of meant 'Yes' by her face.

"Well, we don't both have to go. You stay and look for the Heartless some more."

"No...n-no, I'm being silly. Let's just get this mission over with as fast as possible; but, Roxas, can we check on those foxes before we go home? Just to make sure they're okay?"

"Yeah, we can do that."

The sound of the pack was suddenly drowned out by a corridor sound, closer than ever. The two Nobodies immediately seized each other's hands, listening hard. "It's that way," Roxas said decisively, pointing with the Keyblade.

"What? But I'm hearing it from over there."

"..."

"..."

"Maybe let's try going for the place in between?"

"_Which_ between, though? If you're hearing it from the west and I'm hearing it from southeast, should we be going southwest or north or northeast or what?"

"Um...how about you go that way, and I'll go this way."

"Okay."

By the time they plunged back into the trees, they had forgotten about the dogs. And since the baying had once again died away, they did not immediately remember.

xXxXxXx

"Aaarrrggghhhh!" Roxas whacked his Keyblade against a tree. "Stupid Heartless!"

"We'll find it eventually, Roxas," Xion said soothingly. "Saïx never gives us impossible missions."

Roxas gave her a Look.

"Okay, sometimes he gives us _really, really, really hard_ missions. But never impossible ones."

"Hmph."

"We're still alive, right?"

"I _guess_," he pouted, swinging his weapon up over his shoulder.

There was a bark, somewhere deep in the trees.

"...Roxas?"

"Yeah?"

More barking. Almost friendly-sounding, nothing like the triumphant cries from earlier.

"...Roxas," she suddenly burst out, "I don't wanna wait until we find our target, I want to find those foxes _now_."

"Okay," he agreed readily.

xXxXxXx

Roxas didn't know what he was seeing at first. He wasn't even sure if it was organic.

"Oh," Xion said in relief, "she's just resting in the shade, I thought-"

"That's the mama fox?" Roxas said doubtfully. Now that he looked, it _was_ moving slightly, just...kind of oddly. Like a sort of black shimmering. "Maybe it's a Heartless. A little one. Come to think of it, I haven't seen any at all in this world so far; I'm still on zero Heart Points."

Xion was still staring.

"You think our target's eating them, like the one in Halloween T-?" He broke off in surprise when Xion suddenly gripped his arm hard.

"Roxas," she said in a strange voice. "Something happened to her."

"What?"

When Xion didn't explain or move, Roxas managed to disengage her fingers and then went closer to the thing, which was when he realized that the shimmering was actually a swarm of flies.

_'It's a replica,'_ he thought blankly. _'What's it doing here? Why in the worlds did Vexen make a replica of a _fox_?'_ He couldn't look away. _'Geez, someone really wrecked it. Maybe it was that pack.'_ One of the hind legs had been torn almost completely off, lying grotesquely beside the body. Yellowish-white matter had spilled from the ripped belly, several lengths of what looked like moistly glistening ropes were strewn across the ground. There was almost no blood, though the fur was badly mussed in swirled patterns, as if the dogs had licked it clean. _'Is that really what replicas are made of? I thought-'_

Xion's scream startled him as badly as if someone had fired a gun near his head. He hadn't even heard her approach. "Xion-"

"Look what they did to her!" Xion cried, wilder than Roxas had ever seen her. "Look what they did to her!"

"Xion," he said, alarmed, "it's just a replica. The real fox is probably somewhere out-"

"Nooooo!" She was sinking to the ground now; Roxas hurriedly caught her.

"Xion-"

"_How could they do that to her?_"

"But..." Still holding his friend, he looked back at the wreckage in astonishment. "It - It can't be her. We just saw her earlier, she didn't look like that. She was fine."

"Nooo!" Xion sobbed, exactly as if she had a heart to break. "No! No!"

"But-" Again, Roxas couldn't tear his eyes away. "It can't be," his whispered, his body suddenly going hot. Animals weren't really made out of that weak-looking stuff, were they? If you opened them up, surely they couldn't look like-

He had been pressing a hand against his own belly without thinking, and suddenly realized how vulnerable his own physical form was. "Wait...wait, no..." If he had no magic, no weapon, if all he could do was run, would he really look like that, if he was ever caught by such creatures? Would he really...?

Xion still hadn't stopped sobbing. Her face was dry, but the _sounds_ she was making, Roxas was suddenly afraid that she was going to fade into darkness. "X...Xion...please stop."

"She's gone." Her voice carried nothing but despair. "She's gone...she's gone..."

"I- But-" He was astonished to find that he was shaking. He raised his own hand and stared at it as if he had never seen it before. _'I touched that soft fur. It wasn't really very long ago at all. I felt it. It didn't look anything like that. It didn't feel anything like that.'_ Apprehensively, he looked once more at what was left of the fox, at her face hidden in the grass, remembered how he had kissed the top of that head and told her he'd see her again. "N-No."

Xion still hadn't stopped. If anything, she was getting worse. Roxas didn't know what to do. "X-Xion, do you want me to get Axel?" No answer. Just more sobbing, on and on, like she wasn't going to do anything else for the rest of her life. "Xion, wait, please, I - I'm gonna go get Axel, okay? I'm gonna bring Axel and he'll fix everything, okay? Xion?"

In the end, there was nothing for it but to plunge into a dark corridor and run, thinking frantically, _'Axel, Axel, Axel, have to find him, he'll know what to do, he'll know what to do...'_

The Coliseum, right? That's where Axel had been assigned. Roxas burst out into the courtyard and was immediately ambushed by Heartless. "I don't have _time_ for you!" he yelled, blasting Fira at them and then hurling himself at the Lobby doors, bashing Heartless aside with his Keyblade as he went.

"Oh - hey, rookie," Philoctetes greeted. "Dropped by for some more trai-?"

"Where's Axel?" Roxas burst out frantically. "Wears the same coat as me, really tall and skinny, long spiky red hair, have you seen him? Please, have you seen him? _Please_!"

"Whoa! Settle down, kid; gimme a chance to answer, will ya?"

"Please," Roxas nearly sobbed.

"Look, can't say's I've seen any weirdoes like that around, at least up topside." The satyr hesitated. "But, uh...you can always check 'down below,' if ya know what I mean."

"No, I don't. Where's Down Below?" Roxas demanded.

"You know. The Underworld," Phil clarified, his face screwed up in distaste.

"The Underworld? Where's that? Quick, tell me, please!"

"Just warnin' ya, kid, that's Hades's place. You can traipse around in there all you want, but trust me...it ain't exactly designed to be accommodatin' to the living..."

"Just _tell_ me how to _get_ there," Roxas said in exasperation.

xXxXxXx

So dark. Like a maze, so many twisting pathways; he was lost and he couldn't find Axel and it was getting hard to breathe. "Axel!" Roxas called again. "_Axel_!" Xion was back in that other world, slumped beside that heap of carnage, suffering in a way no Nobody should be able to suffer, possibly losing her existence... "AXEL!" Roxas screamed.

"Oi, oi, oi," came a familiar, welcome voice as Axel strolled out of a dark corridor. "Try not to wake the dead, Rox. This place'll take that way too literally."

"Axel!" Roxas cried in relief, running up to him. "Axel, what do our bodies look like on the inside?"

Axel stared at him. "_Huh_?"

"Is it just _mush_? Is that what they're made of? If someone cut me open, would all that stuff come out instead of-? Instead of...?" He didn't even know what he'd thought bodies were made of. He knew there was blood in there, but there hadn't been any blood. Just...

"Roxas, what in the _worlds_ are you talking about?"

"She...sh-she won't stop screaming, and I, and I don't know what to do, I-"

"Where's Xion?" Axel asked sharply.

"She- I- I came to get you, because I didn't know what to do-"

Axel seized his arm near the shoulder and practically flung them both into a dark corridor.

"Axel," Roxas tried to explain as they ran, "what does it sound like, when a Nobody loses their existence? Because she won't stop, and it sounds horrible, and I'm scared that-"

Axel swore so violently that Roxas didn't dare speak again.

They burst out of the corridor, where Xion lay half-curled in the grass as if dead, except that she was still sobbing dryly.

"Xion!" Axel flung himself to his knees and reached for her.

"Axel," she said shakily, barely able to get the syllables out as she desperately raised her arms to him.

"Xi, are you hurt, where, what happened, I-"

"She's gone," Xion sobbed. "She's gone."

"She?" Clasping Xion tightly in his arms, Axel looked around and finally saw it.

"She wasn't like that this morning," Roxas ventured. "She was soft, and I don't think she really liked us playing with her baby, but she was really nice. But then we heard the dogs, and, I...I thought... Axel, I don't _get_ it! I don't get it! How can that be her? She was _fine_! She's like...it's like she's not even _alive_ now, she's just a thing."

"...Well...she's...not alive, yeah," Axel said slowly.

"But...but when you eliminate things - they just disappear. They don't look like _that_."

Axel closed his eyes. "God, of all the things you two had to see..."

"Why did they do that to her?" Xion sobbed. "How could they do that to her? She wasn't hurting them...she wasn't hurting anyone..."

Axel's voice was very soft. "Xi," he murmured, stroking his hand gently over her hair, "I'm sorry. This is just...what happens. They're not like us. In some ways they're worse, and in some ways they're..." He swallowed hard as memory surfaced. "...Better."

"If I'd just gone to look when I thought of it," Xion groaned. "If I'd just gone right then, instead of looking for the Heartless...maybe I could have found her in time, maybe-"

"There's nothing you could have done," Axel said shortly.

"I saw those dogs earlier," Roxas remembered. "I saw them. If I'd...if I'd just..." _'I should have destroyed them when I had the chance. Then this wouldn't have happened and Xion wouldn't be hurting now.'_

"Listen to me, we are _not_ going to play this," Axel commanded. "Both of you: it was not your fault. There's nothing you could have done. It's _over_, there's nothing you can do. Just keep crying, Xi, because that's all you can do for her right now and that's _okay_, just grieve."

_'Crying?'_ Roxas thought. _'Grieving? That's what it's called?'_ "Xion won't fade away?" he asked anxiously.

Axel looked at him. "What?"

"I thought...I thought she..."

Axel's eyes narrowed. "Come here, Rox." Roxas moved closer, Axel reached for him and stared hard into his face. "You okay?"

"Yeah. I mean...no. I don't know. I thought we weren't supposed to have feelings. Are these feelings?"

"...Roxas-"

"Because I don't like them. I think you're all crazy. I don't think I want my heart back if it's going to be like this."

"Oh, Rox..." Axel held them both now, and Roxas wondered if he should be crying like Xion. There was nothing to cry with, though. He thought he...'felt'...worry for Xion, bad for the fox, angry at the dogs, and so helpless. Inside all of that was an empty space. He figured that's where his heart used to be, and it was bad enough even just having the emptiness; it was hard to think about actually having something _there_ to feel with, making all these fake feelings unimaginably worse.

Axel held them for a long time, and Xion wouldn't stop crying. Roxas wondered how long they were going to sit like this. He finally shifted, and Axel let him go, and he sat up and stared at them both and then back at that heap of gore and red fur. "I still don't understand. Why are they so different? They killed her, they took her heart away, but she's still _there_. She's still there, but...she's not."

"Death for them is different," Axel explained reluctantly. "We're not complete beings...we have no right to exist...but they do. They have hearts to live with, and that life can be taken away, but even when their hearts and souls are gone, they still have bodies to leave behind. Bodies aren't always pretty, Roxas. And the things you can do to bodies, just like the things you can do to souls, can be really, really ugly. It's just that you can't see it when it happens to a soul, even though it's there."

Roxas could see the body, though. Very well. He was finally starting to connect the two pictures in his mind, the living mother full of grace and warmth, and now this that she had become. "But it's...not...fair."

"I know, Rox," Axel said softly. "I told you. There's nothing you can do."

"I can't do it anymore," Xion sobbed. "I can't kill another Heartless ever again."

Axel's eyes narrowed. "Xion - no. I know you feel terrible right now. I'm so sorry sweetheart. I _know_ how you feel, but you're going to have to push through this. You can't just quit. That's just not an option."

"I _can't_!" she cried desperately. "I can't!"

"Heartless just fade, though," Roxas said. "Even when you defeat them, they don't look like...that."

"It's _ending_!" she sobbed. "It's alive and I can feel it and when I kill it, I _know_ how hurt it is! They don't want to die, Axel!"

"Xi, nothing wants to die. Even monsters don't want to die, and that's what they are, they're monsters. They're complete darkness, they have no minds, they hurt and destroy _others_ while they're trying to get what they want. It's a _good_ thing whenever you destroy one, because they can't even _try_ to be good."

"They still have hearts, though," Roxas said unhappily.

"Shut up, Roxas," Axel snapped as Xion let out another wail. "Xi-" She was crying too hard to hear him. "Xion, please," he tried after a minute. "Yes, they have hearts; and yes, I'm sure they don't want to die. But can't you feel it, too, when they're released? If you can sense the pain of their erasure, you've got to be able to pick up on the rest of it, too. That Keyblade of yours, Xi. It's a weapon of Light. It sets captive hearts free. You're only thinking of the darkness imprisoning those hearts, but what about the people who so desperately need those hearts back? Are you thinking of them?"

"No," she said miserably.

"You have to keep trying, sweetheart. I know it's hard, but you can't give up. None of us are _allowed_ to give up yet still keep these half-lives of ours, do you understand me?"

"Yes," she whispered. "Please, Axel."

He held her and murmured to her, and Roxas tried to wait patiently. It felt like a very long time before Xion finally got quiet enough for him to be able to say anything without feeling disrespectful. "What are we gonna do about our mission?"

"Do we still have to finish it?" Xion pleaded.

Axel sighed. "C'mon, Xi. Let's bury her, okay?"

It was afterward, during that long moment of silence as they gazed at the memorial, that Xion suddenly gasped. "Wait- There was- Where-? Axel!"

They both stared at her.

"Axel, there was a baby. There was a baby, where is it? There was a baby, Axel!"

"Okay, okay, okay, don't panic," he responded, sounding just a little panicked himself as he tried to disengage her grip on the front of his coat. "She had a kit with her?"

"Before the dogs got her," Roxas explained. "When we were playing with them. I was petting the mom, and Xion was hugging the baby." He stared around at the grass as if he would be able to see what was missing. "I thought the baby was dead, too, but...it's not here."

They searched, Xion desperately, Roxas anxiously, Axel with a grim look on his face as if he didn't expect a good result. Somehow, they found the place where Roxas had first come upon Xion with the mother and kit.

Nothing.

Roxas had no idea where to look after that, but Xion determinedly forged ahead, trying to trace the steps of the pack as best she could. "I know I heard them over there once, the first time. We can at least see if..."

The trees eventually began to thin out, and Roxas was startled when they came upon unmistakable signs of human habitation. Two houses, one a dreary-looking ramshackle shack in the distance, the other a brightly painted, well cared for little cottage with laundry hanging out to dry in the yard.

"Flaming pants, those are huge bloomers," Axel remarked, before glancing a little guiltily at Xion.

Xion, however, did not seem to have heard, she was too busy staring at something else. She gasped and corridored over to one of the windows, peeping cautiously past the edge to look inside.

"Hey," Roxas said in surprise, "it's Fluffy. He's not all torn up."

"Hm?" Axel, hanging back a little to look at the owl that had been watching them, now shifted his attention back to Roxas. "Fluffy?"

"In that house. The lady's holding him like Xion was. He looks happy."

Axel chuckled as he watched the widow feeding her new fox kit milk from a bottle. "He does look happy." On an impulse, he stepped forward and laid an arm around Roxas's shoulders, drawing him close in a mild hug. "At least this part of it turned out well..."

Xion whirled and rushed back to them, her face alight. "Axel, he's...!"

"Yeah," Axel said gently, "I saw."

"He's okay."

"Yeah."

Xion threw her arms around Axel's waist, he wrapped his other arm around her, and then she lost composure.

"Xion?" Roxas exclaimed. "Why are you crying again?"

"Why?" Xion sobbed tearlessly. "Why did she have to...why did they...?"

"Take what comes, Xi," Axel whispered. "It could have been even worse."

"He'll never see his mother again...he'll never..."

"...But the lady's taking care of him now," Roxas said in a small voice. "It's okay, right?" Not for that poor mother fox. The thought of it brought back that sick sensation of emptiness in his chest, an emptiness he usually didn't notice. But...but for the little one, at least, it was okay, right...?

"If they'd gotten him, too," Xion vowed thickly, "I would have..."

Axel sighed again. "If we see them again, Xi, do what you like. There's something more important we need to take care of first, though."

At long last, the three Nobodies managed to corner the Heartless between them deep in the woods. When the target finally manifested in its true form, Roxas tipped his head back and stared, open-mouthed and horrified. "It..."

"Axel," Xion struggled to say, "I c-can't."

"Not even in this form?" Axel challenged, hefting a chakram over one shoulder as he studied the looming figure of the demonic-looking, hound-like Heartless.

"I can't! Its heart..."

"You can't sense the darkness? I'm not even a Keybearer, and even _I_ can feel it, it's so strong."

"It wants to live!" Xion cried in despair. "Just like she did!"

"Heh." Axel shot her a dark grin. "Look at this thing, Xi, and picture in your mind the pack that killed her. Everything you want to do to them? Unleash it."

"I like the sound of that," Roxas said grimly, gripping his Keyblade in preparation to strike.

Once steel began to creep into Xion's eyes, the Heartless never had a chance. Wherever Roxas's and Xion's lost hearts were, they seemed to beat in unison now, sending strength coursing through them both. All the emotions they should not have had came blazing free with each blow, and Axel soon had a difficult time finding an opening to attack that one of the younger ones did not seize first. "Yes. There it is. Go," he said in satisfaction, pausing to watch.

When Xion struck the deathblow, Roxas glared hard, half-expecting the Heartless to go sprawling, imagining its guts pouring out like black smoke. Yet it simply did what all his other defeated enemies had done, shuddering hugely before giving up its heart and vanishing into mist. It was so unsatisfying. He wanted to bring it back so he could hurt it some more, but there was nothing left to hurt. It was gone.

Xion stood silent and shaking nearby, an expression on her face of mixed viciousness and grief. "It's gone," she finally said in a tight voice, echoing Roxas's thoughts.

"Good work, you two," Axel said quietly.

"Can we please go home now?"

"You guys go on. I'll be along later, all right?"

They stared at him, and he smiled a little.

"I've got my own mission to finish, remember? Back at the Coliseum."

"That wasn't the Coliseum," Roxas said flatly. The sunlit arena and the dark underground depths seemed to be worlds apart, not part of the same one.

"Go on home, Rox. I'll be fine."

"We're coming with you," Xion said in an expressionless voice.

Axel studied her. "You sure?"

"You helped us with our mission, so we should help you with yours. And...I want to be with you."

Axel wordlessly reached out, the two of them took his hands, and they all headed into a dark corridor together.

Now without panic fueling him, Roxas liked the Underworld even less this time around. Xion shivered and pressed closer to Axel, who let go of her hand so he could wrap his arm around her protectively. "You okay, Xi? You still wanna go through with this?"

"I'll be all right as long as I'm with you," she whispered.

Roxas was watching a small figure approaching at a tumbling, uneven pace. He held his Keyblade at the ready, thinking it was a Heartless. A tiny one - he'd be able to take it out easily, maybe even with a single blow. Though he did wonder why it was alone, since most minor Heartless usually attacked in groups.

Axel frowned. "What the...?"

Xion gasped as she recognized what it was.

"Oh," Roxas realized. "It's not a Heartless."

The black and brown puppy flung itself up to plant its front paws on his knee, then lost its balance and plopped back down again, yipping excitedly the entire time.

"He likes you, Roxas," Xion remarked with a subdued smile, though she kept her distance.

"Yeah. I wonder why." Roxas leaned down and picked up the puppy, who wriggled in delight and immediately slobbered over his chin as soon as it could reach.

"It's a shade," Axel said uneasily. "I don't know how the heck it got out of that death cauldron thing, it's so dang small."

"His name is Chocolate," Roxas heard himself saying distantly. He couldn't understand why he was shaking again.

Axel gave him a wary look. "Man, I thought _I_ was bad, adopting every stray puppy that comes romping across my path, but I think you've got me beat, Rox."

Roxas barely heard him. "Hi, Choco," he whispered. His chest hurt. "I missed you." The little shade in his arms butted its head against him affectionately.

"Roxas." Axel set a hand on his shoulder. "Don't even think about it. He's dead. He belongs to Hades now. In fact, we're probably going to have an unscheduled boss battle soon when Hades sends his goons after this little guy."

Xion's eyes were shimmering in distress. "How did he die when he's still just a baby?" she whispered.

It was hard to see now. Axel was staring at him, and finally reached out to touch the tear that had slipped down Roxas's cheek.

"Roxas?" Xion gasped. "Why are you crying?"

Roxas stepped away and scrubbed at his face, suddenly keenly aware that the small body resting in his other arm gave off no warmth, that there was no pulse of life beating within it. "I...I dunno. I'll be okay in a minute, I just..."

xXx

Author's Notes: Hopefully it is painfully obvious that our world is not Disney, and you should never actually approach a wild animal and her baby to play with. -.-

There's no mention of it in the games, but in the manga, Xion likes dogs a lot.

This fic might not be 100% accurate to _The Fox and the Hound_, but I do not care. This story was conceived and written solely for Dusty.

I don't really mind that she died. It was the horrific _way_ she died that got to me. It would have been better if she'd been hit by a car. Even if she hadn't died instantly, it _still would have been better_.

This probably doesn't mean anything to anyone except me, but the morning after it happened, this is the verse I was given by the Holy Spirit. I wanted to place it here, just for my own sake: "So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria enjoyed peace, being built up; **and going on in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit**, it continued to increase." Acts 9:31


	2. Postscript

_**Postscript**_** to a Kingdom Hearts fanfic by Raberba girl**  
(rough draft)

_17 May 2013_

Roxas stared at his mission brief in delight. It had been a while since he'd been assigned to Olympus Coliseum. "Wow! Thanks, Saïx!"

The Luna Diviner, who was not used to being thanked, frowned at him and tried to guess what might have prompted the exclamation. "This isn't a game, and you were not allotted a partner."

"I know. Thanks. I'll see you later!" Roxas opened a corridor and hurried into it.

He emerged outside the Coliseum, feeling pumped with anticipation. "Heart collection, perfect..." He took out Heartless as fast as he could as he made his way to the Underworld.

At the top of the long staircase down, he paused and whistled the signal. By the time he'd finished descending and was looking over the holo-Moogle's wares, his summons was answered.

There was a pattering of approaching paws, a splashing sound and a surprised yelp as the creature failed to skirt the green puddle in the middle of the room, then Roxas turned around just in time for Chocolate to lunge at him, leaving slightly luminous green paw prints on his coat.

"Eww," Roxas laughed, scooping up the little shade. "You're so messy, Choco."

"Yip!" the puppy answered, happily nuzzling and then licking his chin.

"You ready to help me work? Huh, Choco, huh?"

"Yip, yip!"

"Ha ha, okay, that's enough kisses, thanks." Roxas set the dog down and started heading for the entrance to the caverns, with Chocolate trotting at his heels.

An Underworld guardian glared at them as they moved past. "Hey, back off. Axel made a deal with your boss that Chocolate gets to hang out with me every time I come, as long as he doesn't leave the Underworld."

Chocolate growled, pressing close against Roxas's ankles.

"So you can put that scythe thing away."

The guardian fell back, looking sulky.

"Yeah, that's right. Come on, Chocolate, let's go see if we can find any of those gumball Heartless."

"Yip!"

xXx

Author's Notes: First anniversary... I don't plan on doing this again, but for just this first time... :/  
*EDIT* ..._May_ 17th, not April. Yeah, can you tell I'm stressed?

I forgot to mention this last time, but I like the idea that Roxas has Ven's heart, it makes a lot of sense to me. After KH3D came out, I figured that Roxas probably grew his own heart over time, but I don't think that disqualifies the "Roxas started out as Ven" theory. *shrug*

Writing about a pagan Underworld makes me uneasy... -.- I felt conflicted about posting this, and am still not sure whether or not I should have.


End file.
